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Many Alternate Doors, No Exits in Sight (MADNES) 51: A Furnishing of Mimics

Updated: Aug 3, 2023


Groups of things have weird names. Sure you've got the basic ones, like cows being a herd or general birds being a flock. But then it gets weird. For instance: a group of crows is a murder, a group of Karens is a complaint, and a group of Pandas is an embarrassment. (No I'm not kidding).


And that's not even the surface of it. A group of ducks is a badling, a group of sharks are a shiver, and a group of bats are a cauldron. But what, may I ask you, do you call a group of mimics. Events led the group last week to something of an impasse until we'd settled that particular question.


We reached out to reddit and a few other places, looking for some answers, but there was no consensus. Many ideas were offered, but the best idea (a charade) didn't really fit. So we were forced to improvise our own. Which, as you can see, was a furnishing of mimics.


Afterwards we were able to actually get on with the encounter the DM had prepared for us. But we'll get to that.


As you'll recall, the group's last exploits had allowed them to free a possessed Archon and Double Sphinx Supreme. Afterwards Grave T. Robber (The DM still hates that btw) appeared and offered to show them out of the tower to where they might get some help.


There was also this minor bit about Hazel dying and going to Valhalla just long enough to accidentally unveil that Loki was cheating at cards, all before being resurrected by said DSS.


After that rather stiff engagement they decided on a quick breather before heading onward. But, of course, they couldn't afford a breather; they'd already been warned by their sex swapped leader that they needed to move quickly while he restrained the heart.


So, they followed the stairs upward three levels as it wound around the outside wall of the previous room before reaching a doorway. Opening it revealed a large room filled with chain loops hanging down to just a couple of inches off of the ground. A lot of chains. They couldn't really tell how many, as they could only see about a foot into the room.


Of course they didn't know what the chains were for, but they knew one thing for certain: they weren't going in there. After all, the last set of hanging chains had concealed an assassin automaton. Hazel, in an attempt at reconnoiter, tossed a cat's eye (calm down; it's the name of the item, not an actual cat's eye. Sheesh!) she'd obtained from Zha'luskie as close to the center of the room as she could. However, the view from that local was every bit as oppressed as the view from the door.


Thor then reached in experimentally and pulled on one of the chains. It rotated as if on a pulley. Seeing this as a positive development he continued to pull the chain.


{Player's Note: One could say he pulled the DM's chain . . . . . . I'll see myself out . . .}


Eventually there was a click and the all of the chains raised up so they were six inches off of the floor.


At that point Frank surmised that this was all one incredibly long chain and shot one of the loops. Immediately one end rose into the ceiling. But it didn't stop there. The sound of chain rotating around pulleys continued. They could hear the chain at the end being deposited in an ever growing pile somewhere in front of them.


As the collective mass of hanging chain raised higher, they peeked under to see the mass of deposited chain slowly building towards them. Recognizing that they could not simply wait for all of the chain to be deposited without being blocked by its bulk they began edging around the sides of the room.


They made it to the other side as the chains reached 3 feet off of the wall, and began working on the door. As it turned out it wasn't locked in any way; it was just extremely heavy. While 'The Muscle' worked on opening it, Frank kept an eye out behind them.


The pile of chain became easier and easier to see as it got larger and larger, and closer and closer. None of that was very disturbing, but they were talking a lot of chain.


No, it was when some of the chain detached itself from the mass and formed an arm that Frank became rather alarmed. Being a Siege Gunner, there was but one thing to do: he shot it.


The arm recoiled slightly, wringing its hand, then came back out. But that slight diversion bought Thor and Steve enough time to get the door open enough. The group filed in quickly and they set about closing the door behind them, in the hopes that they could seal the chain monster they'd quite literally unleashed behind them.


They almost succeeded too. But just as they were down to a finger's width crack between the door and the frame, chains shot through the opening, grasping the door. They then pulled it open with what appeared to be very little effort.


Seeing their escape plan foiled, the group fell into formation. Thor started things off by throwing his hammer at the creature, seeing as the bow he'd received from the DSS was a bit unwieldy in the spiral staircase they'd found themselves on. Frank shot at it some more. Steve piled out to take up the point position. And Hazel . . . waited to have someone to heal.


It was in the second round of the fight when Thor hit the chain monster with a bolt of lightning that something they hadn't expected changed everything: it giggled. At least, that's what Thor heard, thanks to his Helm of Pissing off the DM. Once he'd relayed this to everyone, Frank suggested talking to it.


Thor started off by telling the thing they didn't want to hurt it, setting aside for the time being their rising concerns about whether they could hurt it at all.


It responded with two words: "No play?" it asked in a slightly hurt voice. With that odd olive branch they called a cessation of hostilities. The thing seemed happy to talk, but of the intellect level of about a 6 year old. They did learn that it didn't like Little Shit, and it did like to play.


That was about it. In the end Thor scrawled a note to the army and gave the thing pathing instructions. Like sending a child to a grocery store with note and some money. In it he specifically suggested the thing be remanded into the custody of the Gnomes.


Then it was time to continue back up. The winding stair case they'd found emptied out onto a large, well . . . furnished, room. There was a bed, a couch, a treasure chest, a small kitchen, and even a closet.


Hazel, having had a very emotional day, made a beeline for the bed, muttering that 'it was probably a mimic, but she didn't care'. Seeing her settle uneventfully into the bed the rest of the group turned their eye to the treasure chest. Above it read a sign stating that it was 'nothing important'.


Liking the idea, Thor took the sign off of the wall and hung it on himself. Meanwhile Frank and Steve were examining the chest. Which of course turned out to be a mimic. As they stated this fact they heard the sound of fingers snapping coming from the closet.


But of course, that mimic was not the only one in this loft nightmare. And every time they found a mimic there came that snapping sound from the closet. Finally, out of frustration, Thor asked aloud what wasn't a mimic in this room. A drawer in the kitchen opened and a spatula popped up, which did not convince them at all.


But nothing attacked. In fact, the chest seemed quite chatty. Of course, most of its conversation revolved around trying to get them to utilize the various furniture. At one point, Thor removed a gold coin and offered it to the chest, which turned it down. It said it was only interested in 'treasure', not trinkets. Thor then pulled the baby mimic he'd been carrying out and fed the coin to it.


Seeing that Thor wasn't a smash mimics first kind of guy, the chest mimic offered him a deal. Apparently, Little Shit had a jewel. A pretty jewel. One that would go well with its collection. (At this point it opened up to show them its booty). In exchange for this gem it would provide them with information. Oh, and the use of a mimic shaped like a meat tenderizer. That last part kind of sold Thor on the deal. (I mean, who doesn't want to hit someone with a hammer that comes with its own bite attack, really?)


Once that deal had been completed, the Mimic bade them stay a while. Kick up their feet. Try the sofa. It was about that point when Thor realized that Hazel actually was sleeping on a mimic. One that was trying to devour her.


Thor flew over to see her lying in a pool of acid on the bed. He quickly tried to pull her from it, failing his very first strength check of the campaign. Steve attempted to follow, only to get tripped up by the rug running between the room's two doors. But he managed to shake it free, and between the two of them they were able to free Hazel.


While they worked on that task, Frank watched their backs. Once The Muscle had freed the Witch, Frank hopped into the up stairwell. Of course, Hazel was quite annoyed at having been yanked from her nice warm bed. It took quite a bit of convincing to get her onto the stairwell that lead further upwards.


But, once there, they all decided to leave. Looking back from outside the room, all they saw was a darkness. A darkness filled with pairs of eyes, watching them.



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